Aidan SunasseeTrauma-informed kink coaching
A space to talk about kink when trauma is part of the picture. Whether you simply want to talk about it with a fellow kinkster, explore the possibility of trauma play, or explore your thoughts on the topic without pressure to be “healed” (or with support in that direction, if that is what you seek!), feel free to book a call with me and we can make it happen.
Book a free 15-minute introduction callWhat trauma-informed means here
You are always in control of how much we explore. You can pause, redirect or take a break whenever you need to. I don’t push you to share your history, and there is no pressure to turn every experience into a breakthrough.
Secondly, I don’t treat kink and trauma as a simple cause-and-effect story. People relate their histories to their play in many different ways, and kink can become a place where some people feel agency, comfort or emotional depth. My job is to help you understand your own experience, not to tell you what it should mean.
How I can help
- 1:1: Kink, Trauma and Emotional Processing. Space to work through shame, confusion, intense reactions, or an experience you’re still slowly making sense of.
- 1:1: Communication and Boundaries. Language and practice for negotiating before, during and after a scene, including repair when something goes wrong.
- 1:1: Scene Building Support. Trying to find the perfect balance of reenactment, but afraid you may open up some past wounds you’d rather remain untouched? Worried about accidentally retraumatizing yourself and wondering what you can do to minimize that risk? I’d be happy to help.
- Workshops: Trauma and Kink, and Trauma Play. Group education for communities, groups and organizations, online or in person. Enquire here.
Booking and cost
Start with a free 15-minute introduction call to see whether it’s a good fit.
Full sessions are €100 per hour, with student discounts and sliding scale options. They run over Zoom, usually with video, although I am open to talking about alternatives you may be more comfortable with. You stay in control of how much we explore and can pause, redirect or take a break at any point.
Most sessions are booked one at a time, but if you’d like regular check-ins, we can set up a multi-session package.
Coaching v/s therapy
I'm a certified sexologist, kink coach, and sexuality educator, not a licensed therapist. Sessions are focused on coaching and education and are not a substitute for mental health treatment. If you’re looking for treatment, a licensed trauma-informed therapist is the right person for you, ideally a kink-aware one.
If you’re in crisis or need immediate help, find international support resources here.
Frequently asked questions
What is trauma play?
Trauma play is the consensual reenactment of scenes or themes tied to past harm. People engage in it for different reasons, including processing, reclaiming agency, intensity, or finding meaning in something that once happened to them without their consent. Like all kink, it can carry risk, but it sure has potential for emotional payoff, which is why preparation, negotiation and aftercare matter so much.
Is trauma play the same as therapy?
No. Trauma play is a kink practice, not a clinical treatment. If you are working through trauma, a licensed therapist is the right person for treatment.
Can kink help with healing from trauma?
People relate trauma and kink in many different ways, and some describe kink as a source of agency, comfort or emotional depth that can lead to healing. However, the experience of “healing through kink” isn’t universal, and using kink as a means towards healing or flourishing isn’t right for everyone.
What if I get emotional or overwhelmed in a session?
You are always in control of how much we explore, and you can pause, redirect or take breaks whenever you need. I can share grounding tools and recommend trauma-informed resources if you need more support.